Can Dreams Resolve Conflict?

Scene from My Week With Marilyn

         Can dreams resolve conflict?

         This question came to me in the early morning hours after a night of many dreams and awakenings.   Before going to bed that prior night I had read an email that led me to sense that a friend of mine had apparently taken offense to something I had said.   I felt uncomfortable with what had been suggested to me and consequently was thinking on this matter as I fell into sleep and throughout the night.   The topic floated in and out of my dreams.

         In this particular case there was no revelation that I would call conflict resolution, but I began to wonder if in some instances dreamers might come to terms with a matter in dispute or come up with an appropriate solution that might fix things later.

         Why not?  Problems are indeed sometimes solved while the mind is in the dream state.  There might not be an actual meeting of the minds that are at odds, but a dream can clarify issues better to show the dreamer that things are either not as bad as previously discerned or begin to develop a rational approach to finding a solution or a state of mind that is more receptive to listening to the different sides of the argument at hand.

         In a state of worry dreams can focus on a problem, looking at it from various angles and dissecting that problem into ways one might not consider when in a state of stress stemming from doubt, fear, and even sadness.    The solutions might evolve into an idea that is symbolic thus requiring interpretation and unraveling.   Then again, the answers might be delivered clearly and directly.

         The key to finding solutions based on dream data is to think on that information and consider the ramifications of all that is presented.   This might be time-consuming and in the end even unproductive, but still attempts are not in vain if the dream data is recorded for future reference.   One never can tell when dream messages can be used in future similar situations.

           My recent occurrence and the restless dream night that accompanied it turned out okay.   The dreams didn't seem to actually solve any problems, but they ameliorated the tension and worry that I had upon going to bed the night before.   Then again, maybe the solutions did appear furtively to me in case I would have to resort to them.

        In any case, the next morning I had an email waiting for me that made the situation better.   For those who might now be considering the possibly of any telepathic communication between minds I will merely claim that I don't think so.

          I do however strongly believe that disputes we may have with others can be analyzed by our subconscious mind via the vehicle of dreaming.   When something such as conflict weighs so heavily upon us the expected consequence would be that these thoughts would enter into our dreams.

           Have you ever had a conflict that was resolved by dreaming?    Do you tend to have restless night when you have experienced some sort of negative encounter with another person?    Would you trust a dream solution that seemed outlandish if there seemed to be no other way to come to terms with someone?

Returning to the Scene of the Dream

 "Midsummer Nights Dream Act IV Scene I--A wood - " (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

       Previous posts have discussed topics related to ongoing dream topics throughout a night's sleep and the déjà vu experience in dreams.  But what about a brief jump back into a dream prior to completely waking from a sleep session.  Specifically I would be referring to the short span when we might awaken from a dream to discover that we still have a few more minutes of sleep time that we can resume before we intend to leave the sleep activity and we return to sleep and to the same dream we were previously having.

       An example is a recent dream experience that I had.  I had been dreaming an intricate dream that seemed very long and involved.  As with so many of my dreams I was dreaming about being on the road with a traveling theatrical production.  The principle players in this dream were my brother and his wife and their daughter and her husband.  There were also unremembered/unidentified persons who may have been family members, friends, or people from my past road tours.

       Like in many dreams of this nature I am confused about my job, there are issues about time, I am having certain conflicts with others in the dream, I am uncertain as to where I am or where I am going next, and many other situations which give me a certain amount of consternation.  However, despite all of these elements there is a certain element of pleasure and positive feeling about the dream.   This is possibly due to the dream players on one hand and the dream setting or situation on the other.  I am with people with whom I feel comfortable and in an occupational setting that brings me good memories.  I overlook the turmoil welling within me because I am happy to be there.

         Then I awaken.  I look at the clock to see that it is 5:01--29 minutes before the alarm is to go off.  I get out of bed to go to the bathroom.  I briefly consider staying up and going to my computer.  Instead I decide to go back to bed to see if I can go back to sleep until the alarm goes off.   The clock now reads 5:02.  I close my eyes and immediately return to sleep.   I return to the same dream setting that I was in before I woke up.

       For the next twenty seven minutes I sleep and dream in the same vein of the dream I had been having.  I am in the same settings with the same cast of dream players and experiencing the same sense of uncertainty and consternation.  It's okay and all is well until I awaken once more.  The clock now reads 5:29.  I get out of bed to wake up my wife.

      Since the dream was a relatively good one for me, I wanted to return to the dream to continue being in the experience of it.   Despite an underlying tension in the dream, I felt comfortable being there and was more than willing to return to the dream after the first awakening.  This type of thing has happened to me before, but not with regularity.  And in this particular case the event was more pronounced when I look back upon it.  Though there did not seem to be a conscious effort on my part to make this happen, it all seemed to occur very naturally.

        As an addendum to this, my final awakening was interesting in itself and rather curious.  The way I woke up will be the topic of my next post as I discuss "The Wake Up Code".

        Do you ever return to dreams that have been comfortable or pleasant?   If so is this something you do willfully?   Or often?   Are you able to will lucid dreams?

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What Types of Dreams Provide You Comfort?

Dream girl (Photo credit: @Doug88888)

         There are times when I wake up in the morning feeling tired from stress-filled dreams.   There are other times when I might wake up feeling happy and even amused because I've had humorous dreams.  Then there are those dreams that leave me feeling very peaceful, calm, and comforted.   My sense of well-being after having this sort of dream may last for a short period or throughout the course of the day.  When I think back on the dream, I recall the comforting feeling the dream provided.

          Usually the dreams that make me feel comforted involve people who have passed away.  The most frequent dreams of this nature feature appearances by my father, who passed away in 1990, and my friend Fred, who passed away in 1995.  These dream characters rarely speak and if they do it is only a few words.  Primarily their roles in my dreams are mostly a presence much like a guardian angel or a spirit.  The dreams may contain some potential of a threatening circumstance, but my dream guardians seem present to protect me if need be.

         On some occasions in the dreams about my father I will hear his laughter and that tends to soothe me.  In life he had an infectiously fun laugh and hearing it in the dream lifts my spirits.  When I awaken from dreams where the deceased make an appearance, I am never sad or afraid, but I feel glad that I have been able to be with them.

         Another type of dream that gives me a peaceful satisfied feeling is the dream where I am recognized for an achievement or some particular level of status.   This is usually involving a work scenario where I have accomplished a job well done or I feel confident about my position.    Occasionally these dreams can involve a school setting, but this is not as frequent as when I was younger and actually still attending school.

         A final dream contentment scenario involves dreams where all is well with family, life, job, or some other life circumstance.  There is no frantic activity in these dreams or if there has been earlier in the dream, before waking all has been resolved.   These dreams would be more similar to normal waking life when nothing extraordinary or unusual is happening.

         My guess is that these dreams are partly wishful and partly reflections on states of well-being in my life.  When one of these dreams has occurred there is no abnormal stress or anxiety in my life and my time of sleep consists of good rest.  Like most dreams, these probably are symbolic examinations and reinterpretations of my day.  If the day has been peaceful, then likewise the dream.

         Do you have dreams of deceased loved ones?   Are you comforted by these types of dreams or do you find them disturbing?    Do you find the stressful dreams more easy to remember than the peaceful ones?

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