Dream girl (Photo credit: @Doug88888) |
Usually the dreams that make me feel comforted involve people who have passed away. The most frequent dreams of this nature feature appearances by my father, who passed away in 1990, and my friend Fred, who passed away in 1995. These dream characters rarely speak and if they do it is only a few words. Primarily their roles in my dreams are mostly a presence much like a guardian angel or a spirit. The dreams may contain some potential of a threatening circumstance, but my dream guardians seem present to protect me if need be.
On some occasions in the dreams about my father I will hear his laughter and that tends to soothe me. In life he had an infectiously fun laugh and hearing it in the dream lifts my spirits. When I awaken from dreams where the deceased make an appearance, I am never sad or afraid, but I feel glad that I have been able to be with them.
Another type of dream that gives me a peaceful satisfied feeling is the dream where I am recognized for an achievement or some particular level of status. This is usually involving a work scenario where I have accomplished a job well done or I feel confident about my position. Occasionally these dreams can involve a school setting, but this is not as frequent as when I was younger and actually still attending school.
A final dream contentment scenario involves dreams where all is well with family, life, job, or some other life circumstance. There is no frantic activity in these dreams or if there has been earlier in the dream, before waking all has been resolved. These dreams would be more similar to normal waking life when nothing extraordinary or unusual is happening.
My guess is that these dreams are partly wishful and partly reflections on states of well-being in my life. When one of these dreams has occurred there is no abnormal stress or anxiety in my life and my time of sleep consists of good rest. Like most dreams, these probably are symbolic examinations and reinterpretations of my day. If the day has been peaceful, then likewise the dream.
Do you have dreams of deceased loved ones? Are you comforted by these types of dreams or do you find them disturbing? Do you find the stressful dreams more easy to remember than the peaceful ones?
I dream alot about my mother whether it's because I am having problems with the family I really don't know.
ReplyDeletePerhaps she's trying to advise me.
Great post Lee.
Yvonne.
Ps have to change to Internet provider this one I'm on is playing the fool.
I had a dream about my mother who was deceased. We had been at odds with each other for some years. I wished there had been an emotional healing before she died. A few years later, I had a dream where she was younger and she came to me and hugged me. I woke up feeling happy.
ReplyDeleteMy dreams are either Dali-esque or Monet-ish. Totally wigged out or blurry and impressionistic.
ReplyDeleteAt times I dream of loved ones, days when I was younger. I lost three of my grandparents when young, and the fourth in my early 20's. I'd love to have grown up around them more.
I sometimes dream about my grandfather but more often about his house. Generally, the dreams are not particularly comforting but , then again, neither was he. I wish I could dream about my dad. He died in 1996 and I miss him but seldom dream about him. It would be nice to feel his presence again. :(
ReplyDeleteI love dreaming about my deceased parents - I reckon it's their way of saying 'hello' or at least some sort of connection being made.
ReplyDeleteAm not so happy when I don't dream .. sometimes there are long and dry periods of no dreaming ..
Thank you for this ...
(I messed up on A-Z - my son from a distance helped me and it got totally messed up :( :( :( )
To my knowledge I've never dreamed of a deceased relative. My dreams of late usually involve babies. I'm kind-of obsessed. My clock is ticking and even though I've already got some, I want (and have always wanted) more!
ReplyDeleteOther than those sweet dreams if I remember a dream it is usually because it terrorized me. Sharks, zombies, aliens and apocalypses. Sometimes even a bigfoot. I dream of the unknown because (as my BFF put it) I find it easier to deal with being afraid of things I know won't happen because the fears of what could happen would cripple me.
Yvonne -- We might dream of parents for the same reason some of us might dream of school or work. It's like a refuge into familiarity--a longing to be in a simpler or more secure time.
ReplyDeleteEm -- I can see where a dream like that would be comforting since it seems to indicate forgiveness and understanding. A message from you mother? Maybe, or maybe your subconscious mind creating a wishful scenario to help you forgive yourself.
ML -- My first question would be how's your vision? Or perhaps there is an underlying health situation that is causing the appearance of your dreams. Dali I can understand since his art is dream art. But I'm just wondering about the influence of possible certain physical conditions on your dreams. Your dreams of loved ones may reflect your wish to have been able to spend more time with them. Dreams are nice that way at times.
Gracie -- I think you are experiencing what I think of as "Big House Dreams". Often these dreams reflect waking life anxieties and insecurities about uncertain things in our lives. We wander a place sometimes familiar or not that seems to have many rooms, hallways, or other aspects. The house or building may represent our world and our life. We may encounter many people both familiar and unfamiliar or we may encounter no one in our search for someone. These can be very disconcerting and tiring dreams. To dream about your father you might spend some time during the day or right before sleep looking at pictures of him while recalling events that you remember. Imagine what the dream would be like. Don't try to force the dream, but just influence you subconscious with subtle suggestion. An example from my own experience is that yesterday I woke up from a dream about being on a cruise ship. I've never been on a cruise before, but I'd been listening to reports about the ship stranded somewhere and the travails of the passengers, picturing the scenario as I heard it recounted on the radio. I'm sure that was the influence for my dream.
Lee
Susan-- Though we sometimes have dry spans of time when it seems we are not having dreams, I believe that the dreams are still there--we just aren't remembering them. Why? I don't know, but my guess is that our minds may be too preoccupied with other concerns, our sleep may be influenced by certain drugs or other influences, or we may be just sleeping so restfully that the dreams are not noticed. I like to remember my dreams, but sometimes it almost seems as though I may not have dreamed at all.
ReplyDeleteHeather -- I think the significance of your dreams is pretty obvious and you are quite aware. The baby dreams reflect your wishes and the scary dreams symbolize some kind of fear in your life. The fears are something for you to determine by figuring out what the "monsters" might represent to you. Talking it out with you BFF might help give you some additional insights. Your fears may be of things quite absurd and harmless.
ReplyDeleteLee
Hi Arlee,
ReplyDeleteAn interesting piece indeed.
To tell you the truth, so far
no such dreams occurred in my life.
Or may to be re-collecting it.
Anyways good to know about such dreams, so far the comments too are interesting,hope many may come with their dreams LOL
Best
Phil
I dreamt about my dad a lot after he died but not in a long time. And none of my dreams are easy to remember anymore.
ReplyDeleteI agree that we dream even if we don't remember them ..
ReplyDeleteMy stressful dreams are usually the most memorable. A few weeks ago I dreamed that one of our vehicles was involved in an auto accident. Two days later it happened in real life. Not the same circumstances as in the the dream, but the same vehicle. Weird! ~Angela
ReplyDeleteFor me, if I remember a dream (either pleasant or frightening)it generally stays with me forever. And, yes, I have had dreams about departed loved ones, and they are most comforting.
ReplyDeletePhil -- You may not be aware of the dreams. Do you ever wake up with an extraordinary sense of calm or well-being? If so your dreams may have been partly responsible.
ReplyDeleteJoJo-- Deceased parents are probably common for many of us to dream about.
Your inability to remember dreams might have a lot to do with the things going on in your daily life.
Susan -- Yes we all dream, remembered or not.
Angela -- A bit of premonition perhaps? I agree about the stressful dreams being most memorable unless the dreams have been really, really good.
Paula -- If we lock the dreams into our memory they will stay, but usually we don't and we forget what we've dreamed.
Lee
You certainly dream a lot! Most of the time, I can't remember my dreams. Lately, I've been waking up really fatigued. Now I'm wondering what I'm dreaming about!
ReplyDeleteSherry -- We all dream a lot. I guess I focus on my dreams and remember them more than a lot of people do. You should try to remember your dreams on the mornings you wake up fatigued. The dreams may be part of the problem and they may be trying to tell you something.
ReplyDeleteLee
I found just reading about your dreams comforting and calming! I tend to dream a lot as I sleep however, waking up and remember what the dream was about would make all the difference.
ReplyDeleteReally enjoyed the read!
It's amazing how we connect with loved ones we miss. I can imagine how soothing those dreams are.
ReplyDeleteBetty -- You can train yourself to remember dreams better. Just writing down some key elements of those dreams and thinking about them can help tap into the fuller dream picture. Timing is the biggest problem. When we awaken it's not always convenient engage in dream recall and retention as we have other things to which to attend and we soon forget. But practice when you can and dream memory may begin to come more easily.
ReplyDeleteCiara -- When there are those you know you will never see again in this life, it's nice to be able to spend time with them in dreams.
Lee
Brilliant post!
ReplyDeleteI find these dreams (about those I've loved who have left this world) are most joy-full. It's as if I've spent time with them. Their embrace is their embrace, and their voice or their laugh, it's as if I'm given back things I might have forgotten.
So wonderful.
DM -- Yes! It like we've been given another chance to make up for lost times. These are some of the best dreams.
ReplyDeleteLee
My father died three years ago, and since then, when he now appears in my dreams he is always my "youngish dad", from when I was about four or five years old. He is always wearing the same outfit he wore while building our lake cottage at that time back in the seventies: Navy blue t-shirt and brown pants. His teeth are still really crooked since he did not have them fixed till he was in his late fifties.
ReplyDeleteI had not recalled these small facts about my dad until my dream- mind reminded me. Somewhere in my memories, my Dad is locked forever in those work clothes, being the kind, happy, busy dad of those years.
Anyway, I've noticed it brings me great comfort to see him in my dreams, which doesn't happen that often, but now when he does make an appearance, I always lucidly recognize that he's there, and give him a hug first thing because he always disappears quickly.
I enjoy these dreams and feel that it's not so much my Dad-as-ghost coming to visit me but my sweet, uncomplicated memory of him, which serves to remind me who he used to be to me, when a father was such an important part of a little girl's life.
~Just Jill
Jill--It's interesting how our dream memory can capture a person in a certain time as we most picture them. I've done much the same thing with certain people. It's beautiful and comforting that there is nothing frightening about seeing those who have passed on in our dreams but that we can spend time with them again. It's like a subconscious wish fulfilled.
ReplyDeleteLee